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If you are like me then whenever you have to talk to a stranger

these thoughts come to your mind also.

'Am I looking okay?'

'What if they don't like me?'

'OMG...but my English is so bad.'

'What if they think I am stupid?'

I was shit scared of talking to new people too

but even then, I went on to represent India

at the World Championship of Public Speaking at Florida, USA

after winning 4 rounds.

And if I can stand on that stage

and talk to hundreds of strangers, without peeing my pants

then so can you. And today I am going to tell you exactly how.

So it doesn't matter if you just want to go to a stranger and say 'Hi',

give a smashing presentation infront of hundreds of strangers

or simply ask a guy or a girl out on a date;

today by the end of this video, you will learn

how to be confident while talking to strangers.

So in today's video we are going to learn

how to talk to one stranger,

how to talk to 10-12 strangers in a Group Discussion, especially during interviews.

And finally we are going to see how to master public speaking

and give brilliant presentations; be it in your school or in your office.

But most importantly, towards the end, I'll give you a Bonus Tip

that will turn the tables and make you fall in love

with talking to strangers.

But before that, if you like what I am saying

make sure you hit that big fat 'Like' button

because that motivates me to make more videos.

Let's begin.

See, all of us have a close group of friends and family

that we are very comfortable talking to.

But when it comes to talking to somebody outside this group,

we think twice about it, our heart starts beating faster

and some of us even start sweating.

So here are the 3 things that you must do

to keep your heart-rate in check.

1. Realise that you do not have to be perfect.

I want you to think about the top 3 villains that you hate.

Mine are Regina George from Mean Girls,

Kamolika from Kasauti

and ofcourse, Thanos.

If you think about it, all of these 3 characters

are smart, dress great and are...

Perfect.

And that's why we hate them.

Being perfect will not make people like you.

On the contrary, it will make people dislike you.

Whenever you are talking to someone and he/she notices

that you also have flaws, you also make mistakes,

you also have your insecurities just like them,

that's when that connection happens.

2. Make it about them.

If you want to build a rapport with someone,

make the conversation all about them.

You can ask questions like...

'Where did you do your schooling?'

'Did you like the new Avengers movie?'

'How are you so smart, tell me, do you also watch The Urban Fight videos?'

This has 2 benefits...#1) People love talking about themselves.

So give them that opportunity and learn more about them.

#2. When you shift your mental focus from

'Omg, what am I saying? How am I looking?'

to all about them i.e their opinions, their interests

that's when your nervousness goes down.

3. Join different groups.

Jump on the opportunity of meeting new people.

So help organise events,

join clubs like Toastmasters, BNI, Rotary etc..

where you will get to meet new people reguarly

and have one-on-one conversations.

Now apart from these groups, another thing that

will help you talk to new people, even outside your country

is this app called, 'Cambly'.

They have tutors from US, UK, Canada

and this app provides 1-on-1 speaking practise sessions with them.

I'll show you how this app works just before the Bonus Tip

but for now, remember, you need to get yourself in situations

either through groups, through apps or through communities

where you can have as many 1-on-1 conversations as you can.

Be it for MBA, Job Recruitment or Bank Exams,

Group Discussion is an important round, but

it is very different from a 1-on-1 conversation

because here you have to impress a recruiter

who is not even talking to you.

Instead, the room is full of chaos;

he is shouting, she is shouting

and nobody is letting you speak.

But as Littlefinger says, 'Chaos is a ladder'.

Now let's see how we can climb it.

Whenever you are in a Group Discussion, you can do 2 things

to impress a recruiter.

1. Show that you are a professional.

Even if others are shouting, you don't shout.

It's just disrespectful.

And avoid using informal phrases like,

'Kya yaar? Whaat re?'

On the other hand, you don't have to use complicated words

like Shashi Tharoor or be a Grammar Nazi.

It's okay to make a few grammatical mistakes here and there

as long as you are confident while speaking.

2. Show that you are flexible in accepting other people's views.

This is important because eventually you will work in a team

where not everybody will agree with you.

Your team members will come from

different lifestyles, backgrounds, religions, beliefs.

So even if they don't align with the way you think,

it's important that you are open to new ideas.

If you want to know how to start a GD,

what to say in the middle,

how to summarise it towards the end

and want to know what kind of topics come in a GD round then

I've made a separate detailed video titled,

'How to prepare for a Group Discussion'

You can find this video on my YouTube channel

or I've even left the link in the description.

Make sure you check it out.

Do you want to know a secret?

Everybody is afraid of public speaking.

The fear of public speaking is the number 1 fear

more than death; which means people are ready to die

instead of speaking in public

which means this fear is no joke.

But just like any other skill, even public speaking can be mastered

and here are the 5 ways to do it.

1. Whenever you are on stage, KISS.

Keep it simple, silly.

Have you ever heard Navjot Singh Siddhu speak?

'A fallen lighthouse is more dangerous than a reef'

*That was a very bad impression*

'Even a cock crows over his own dunghill'

I am sure he is a great man but what I am trying to say is that

it's okay to sound complicated and smart

whenever you are writing a book or the dialogues of a movie.

You can pause and rewind.

But whenever you are giving a presentation,

your audience cannot pause and rewind you.

So you need to be clear from the word go.

So keep it simple just like

you talk to your friends.

It's okay to be nervous on stage.

The problem is when we show the audience that we are nervous

by clutching our wrists too tight,

playing with our pockets or

pulling on a hand-kerchief.

So here are a few gestures that you must avoid

whenever you are on stage.

*Playing with your hair*

*Apologising too many times*

*Having your arms crossed*

*Turning your back to the audience*

The easiest way to take care of your body language is to

get on to the stage and

take a few seconds to relax yourself.

Just breathe and smile.

And then start.

3. Forget about audience reaction.

When you are public speaking, you are talking to a

group and in that group somebody fought with his wife,

somebody did not get promotion,

somebody is tired,

somebody is addicted to Instagram.

And all of these reactions have nothing to do with you personally.

Think of it this way, when you go to hear someone speak

do you wait for their speech to bomb?

No, right?

You are there because you want to learn something from them.

Most of the audience wants you to succeed

and the rest of them don't care because

they have their own priorities.

So even if you see a few bored faces here and there

forget about it and just focus on

your delivery, you presentation because this

is your moment and nobody else

can take it away from you.

Before I move on to the next section, this is

what I want you to do.

Comment and let me know, when was the last time

you heard a great presentation and who gave it?

Was it your school principal?

or somebody from your office or was it a TED Talk?

Incase you have it, provide the YouTube link below

so that all of us can watch and learn from it.

4. Invest as much time and money

it takes to learn how to speak.

Let me tell you a story..

In 2010, I joined a public speaking club called Toastmasters.

It's a self-help club. Nobody is an expert but

it's a community that learns by supporting each other.

I used to pay 6$ per month to be a part of it

which is like 72$ per year.

My college friend used to tell me,

'Why are you wasting money, just to go there and speak?'

Just a few months back he pinged me. His name is Aziz

and he said, 'You remember how I used to make fun of you?...

..I was wrong. Clearly, public speaking changed your life!'

So invest as much time and money

it takes to learn how to speak well.

Obviously do not fall for those shams that

promise you that they will teach you English in just 30 days.

But...if it's an app, a club or a community

that says that it's a process and they are with you throughout that process

then try them out for a few times,

see how others have progressed

and if you get positive vibes from them

invest your time and money in it.

Because I have seen people get way ahead in their careers just by

getting over their fear of speaking.

And one of the ways of investing your time and money

is through the 'Cambly' app.

Before I give you the Bonus Tip, remember I told

you that I'll show you how Cambly works.

So this is how the app looks like,

you can see the list of the tutors

and where are they from.

Check out their profile and

start talking to them like this...

So that's how easy it is to talk to someone through Cambly

and yes this video is sponsored by them.

But you know that I do not accept sponsorship requests unless I really believe in the product

and I think Cambly is a great way to

talk to new people and learn how to speak confidently

especially when you are preparing for exams like IELTS.

And I even got a discount for you.

Go to the subscription page and type the Promo Code, 'theurbanfight' and

you'll get a flat 30% discount on all of the packages.

I really hope it works out for you.

Look, being nervous is not new to you.

You were nervous on your first day of school,

you were nervous when you first rode the bike,

you were nervous when you gave your first exam.

But now, all of that nervousness is under your control, right?

You know why?

Because you are a fighter.

Just like any other skill, speaking confidently

is also a skill that takes constant practise

that only a fighter like you can do.

So today's Bonus Tip is this...

..always go back!

Every time you fail on the stage, go back and do it again.

Every time you screw up talking to someone,

go back and do it again.

Every time you do not clear a GD round,

go back and do it again.

You will be nervous

but it only means that this thing

is important to you.

Nervousness is not a STOP sign,

it is a GROWTH sign.